Guns, guns, shoes, and munchkins galore!
by Sarah-FFVII
Summary: Ahem. These are the Rambles that I, as well as a two of my other friends, write/co-write. They really don't go in a specific order, but I'll try to organize them as much as possible. And, there won't be any summaries, because it'll make no sense. So there


Guns, guns, shoes, and midgets galore!!  
  
***Sarah, Bunni, Carlos Juan, Sephiroth, and Cloud decided to get into Bunni's car and drive around aimlessly in the countryside. Sarah brought along a pitcher of iced tea, for the day was very hot.. And Bunni's AC wasn't working..***  
  
Sarah- *guzzles down her fifth glass of iced tea* AH! Refreshing...  
  
Sephiroth- *guzzles down a sixtieth* Yep.  
  
Bunni- Too... much.. sugar... *faints*  
  
Carlos Juan- *laughs, then faints himself*  
  
Cloud- *sniff* Just because I have memory loss and momentary bouts of insanity doesn't mean I'm unable to sustain a little bit of sugar..  
  
Sephiroth- *laughs and grabs the steering wheel*  
  
Sarah- *kicks Sephiroth* Stop it!!  
  
Cloud- See, no one pays attention to me... *sniff*  
  
Sephiroth- *pinches her and grabs the wheel again*  
  
Sarah- *lets go of the wheel and stuffs the first thing she finds up his nose* Stop, I said!!  
  
Sephiroth- *accidentally inhales the pantyhose*  
  
Bunni- *wakes up* Hey... Those were mine..  
  
Carlos Juan- *snores*  
  
Cloud- Mr. Hand, what do you think? *talks loudly to his hand*  
  
Sephiroth- *turns blue in the face*  
  
Sarah- *swerves the car out of control* Ack!! Who's driving?!  
  
Bunni- I dun wanna play strip poker anymore..... *faints again*  
  
Cloud- *looks up* First Bunni was, then she passed out. Sephiroth then grabbed the wheel and then you took it from him. Now, no one is! *screams*  
  
Sarah- We're gonna crash!! *looks around to see Bunni and Carlos Juan unconcious, Cloud insanely speaking to his hand and her, and Sephiroth choking* Well then...  
  
**They crash into a wooden fence. Suddenly, a tornado appears and whisks them away to the magical and strange little world of BOZ. There, they awake and climb out of the totaled car..**  
  
Bunni- My head hurts...  
  
Carlos Juan- My... *glares from others*.. hurts..  
  
Sarah- Me duele el estomago...  
  
Sephiroth- What?  
  
Sarah- ¿Qué?  
  
Bunni- Sarah, you're speaking Spanish!!  
  
Sarah- *panicks*  
  
Carlos Juan- Puta...  
  
Sarah- *glares at Carlos Juan and looks for a sharp and deadly item*  
  
Cloud- No hablo español..  
  
Bunni- *screams*  
  
Sarah- I wish Carlos Juan would die!!!  
  
Sephiroth- She's speaking English again.  
  
Bunni- Neat-O...  
  
Cloud- Me llamo Cloud.  
  
Carlos Juan- Ha! My 'magical' spell worked!! *jumps with glee*  
  
Sarah- *shoots CJ with a gun she finds randomly on the ground*  
  
Carlos Juan- *falls to the ground, they shove him into a small picnic basket Bunni was carrying and start down a road made of lemon yellow bricks*  
  
Cloud- Me gusta pollo.  
  
Sarah- Bunni.. Did you happen to bring any duck-tape?  
  
Bunni- No, why?  
  
Sephiroth- *glances at Sarah* ..? Duck tape?  
  
Sarah- *laughs at Sephiroth's expression* You don't wanna know.. *to Bunni* Oh, nothing..  
  
Carlos Juan- *bangs on the inside of the picnic basket* Lemme out!! I'll use my fairy wand on you!!  
  
Bunni- *kicks the basket* Shaddup!! It's in the car anyway!  
  
**Suddenly, out of the bushes come running rabid midgets with giant lollipops and candycanes. They start attacking the group while screaming 'follow the lemon-yellow brick road.'**  
  
Sarah- *is hit with a giant lollipop* Ouch!! Take that, you deformed midget!! *kicks it*  
  
Bunni- Ack!! Sephiroth, save me!! They're trying to look up my skirt!! Mini-size pervs!!! Ack!! *screams and kicks wildly*  
  
Sephiroth- *has fragments of candy can stuck in his silvery hair* My hair! How dare you touch a God's hair?! DIE!! *Pulls out the Masamune and goes on a rampage*  
  
**And amazingly, they still survive.**  
  
Cloud- Me llamo es muchacho loco...  
  
**The munchkins stop their attack and look to Cloud, falling to their knees and worshipping him.**  
  
Sarah- Um.. *looks around* Isn't this a bit off?  
  
Bunni- Do the mini-sized pervs speak Spanish or something?  
  
Sephiroth- *attacks them again. This time they actually die* HA!  
  
Cloud- *goes to speak*  
  
Sarah- Wait, Cloud! Don't speak unless those dumb midgets come after us again!! *pokes him, whispering* And I'm your girlfriend, so they won't harm me..  
  
Bunni- *shakes her finger at Sephiroth* You were supposed to help me!!  
  
Sephiroth- Not true. My hair comes first! *pats his hair*  
  
Bunni- Oh, I see how it is!! You're putting your hair over me!! I'm leaving you!! *in hysterics*  
  
Cloud- *goes to speak, but Sarah silences him*  
  
Sarah- *taps Bunni on the shoulder, whispering* You two weren't dating in the first place..  
  
Bunni- *elbows Sarah in the gut* Shaddup! You're ruining my dramatic moment!!  
  
Sarah- Why I oughtta... *picks up that gun she had found earlier*  
  
CJ- *somehow breaking out of the picnic basket, hopping on Sarah's shoulder* Aw, babe, don't fight over me! There's enoug of me to go around!! *tries to grin seductively and fails miserably*  
  
Bunni- *pokes CJ and he falls off Sarah's shoulder*  
  
Sephiroth- *combs his hair* Damn munchkins..  
  
Sarah- *shoots CJ again, stuffing him into the basket and tying it up with Bunni's pantyhose that Sephiroth had finally coughed up* HA!  
  
Cloud- Lo siento..  
  
Sarah- Cloud!! Stop talking!! *points the gun at him*  
  
Bunni- Gosh, you're violent today..  
  
Cloud-...  
  
Sephiroth- *Smiles at himself in a mirror* I'm so beautiful!  
  
Sarah- Grr...  
  
Bunni-Sarah!!! *Panics* Nooo! What about Sephy and my kids? What will they do with out parents?  
  
Sarah- Bunni, Shut up! Now, We are goin g to skip down this &*%^% lemon-yellow road! And we are going to hum "Mary had a Little Lamb"!!! Do I make myself clear?!  
  
Bunni-The tea went to her head...  
  
Sarah-*Blinks* Tea?  
  
Cloud- *opens his mouth to speak*  
  
Sarah- Shut up, Cloud!  
  
CJ-*scratches on the basket* Can I get out please?!  
  
Sarah- *Shoots the basket*  
  
Bunni-*drops the basket*   
  
Sephiroth- Perfect...Pretty hair...*Notices Sarah's dangerous attitude and the gun she held, and also, Cloud inability to speak freely*Anyone have any mousse?  
  
Bunni- *wacks Sephiroth upside his head, messing up his hair again* Geez...  
  
Sephiroth-Noooo!! My hair!! Grr....*His eyes turn red* Must kill... Bunni..kill..Bunni...  
  
Sarah- *throws the gun at Sephiroth* Grr... * Turns normal* Evil possessive gun...*The gun shatters*  
  
Sephiroth- Gah.. pretty faries... I want one...  
  
Cloud- *notices something shinning in the bushes*  
  
Bunni- *Follows his gaze*...? *Walks to the bushes and pulls out a box, the size of a shoe box and smiles* Oohh!! Treasure!  
  
**Suddenly, a huge tornado wisks by and carries everyone off**  
  
All-Ahhh!!!  
  
Sephiroth-My hair!!!!  
  
** Later**  
  
**The group lands in the front lawn of the "Place"**  
  
Bunni- *wakes up and realizes something had fallen on her* Oh, Sephy..Wait... Ack! Cloud!! Get off me you freak!! *Throws Cloud off her and he lands on the passed out Sarah*  
  
Sephiroth- *weakly* My..hair..pretty..hair...* Sits up and looks around, and notices Tifa coming towards the group*   
  
Tifa- *Gasps as she sees the unconscious Cloud on top of the fainted Sarah* That crack using whore! *Runs back inside and retrieves Cloud's special wheelchair, then runs back outside and throws him in it* Now, you are mine..*Runs away from Sarah, Pushing Cloud at a dangerously fast pace, toward the pond*  
  
Bunni-*Sits up and notices the treasue she had found* Hmm... I wonder what this is..*Opens it to reveal...*  
  
Narrarator- That's all for now, folks! Read the next ramble to find out about Bunni's treasure, magic wishes, and split ends! Til next time!!!  
  
The End! Not..  
  



End file.
